Truthy Tuesday, Changes

Another episode in over thinking it.  This week I wanted to analyze how different KidMakes’ childhood is from my own, sociologically and emotionally.

When I think of my own childhood, I remember pain and turmoil and sadness.  I know that’s not all there was, but that’s what stands out in my memories.   My mom had a breakdown when I was 7, which led to a diagnosis of Manic Depression, now commonly referred to as Bi-Polar Disorder.

I remember that day.  She was talking about how we couldn’t go outside to pick my brother up from tennis lessons because the world was going to end, and it was her fault.

I convinced her to get into the car and drive the mile or so to pick him up (not the safest thing, from my adult POV).  He had started walking home and was pissed until he got a look at my face.

Since that day, I have felt the need to protect my mother.  I think that day my childhood ended.

My child will be 7 in a couple of months.  This is bringing up some…stuff…for me.  To manage my anxiety around this, I used this post to show myself how different her life as a child is from how mine was, and in turn how different my life is now compared to my mom’s in 1985.

(Mother’s Day also brings up stuff for me, so there’s that as well…)

Mother’s Day 2012

Every Mother Counts

Thanks to all the Mothers I’ve had in my life. Thanks to all the ‘Mothers’ upon who’s backs we now stand. Pray we do the work to preserve what rights they have purchased for us with their sweat, blood and tears.

Love and empathy to those who must mother themselves.

Truthy Tuesday

I know, another series. This one will specialize in naval gazing and will hide mostly behind a jump.  The posts that I enjoy reading always expose the writer’s soft under belly, some snapshot of their lives, minds, inner workings.  So I thought I’d write a few posts like that for my blog.

I’m also working on my feelings around adoption and how mine has affected my life, perception and feeling toward myself.  So there’s that, too.

Loss

I don’t think anything is easy in life and I don’t think anything ever was. I think it gets more difficult as you get older because you’re facing the end and endings are, as I talk about in my book, unbearable. Loss is tragic. Our lives are basically about facing that tragedy. And I think the sooner we face that we’re going to die, the easier it is to appreciate the moments in life, to enjoy for instance sitting here and looking at the sunlight coming through those curtains. When we realize that our lives will end, we take less for granted. That is what I’ve learned from loss. The whole thing is a fantastic mystery so all we can do is appreciate each moment.

- Diane Keaton, from her interview in the Huffington Post

International Women’s Day 2012

Happy International Women’s Day 2012.

I look forward to a future when we do not need a day to ‘celebrate’ women because it happens all the time.

You’re gonna want to check these out:

International Slutty Women’s Day: A Story in GIFs – Ann Friedman dot com

This is just an unending onslaught of bullshit! It is so tired. I mean, how many times do we have to remind you to get your laws—and sometimes your actual hands—off our bodies?

{**I really cannot do this post justice with a quote.  You must click over to see the accompanying GIFs, which are awesome and hilarious.}

The Spectacular Triumph of Working Women Around the World – The Atlantic dot com

The triumph of women in the workplace has been one of the great success stories of last 100 years. Remember, in the U.S., it wasn’t until 1920 that the states signed a constitutional amendment banning voting discrimination by sex. Less than a century later, the rise of the female worker has added nearly 2 percentage points per year to GDP growth. In Europe, economists estimated that the shrinking gap between male and female employment contributed 25% of Europe’s growing wealth in the last two decades. As the Economist once put it: More than China, more than the Internet, and more than banks and central banking, economic growth is driven by women.

Infamy

(Image Source)  Edited to add an Update

Another

One question I always face is, “When do you two plan on having another?” or some variation on this theme.  Not the most appropriate question, but I believe the intent is usually good, so I answer.

Gratitude’s for Suckers

Hello again.  A bit of a break there, hmmm.  A little writer’s block, mixed with some family drama and a dash of vacation road-tripping.  Oh holidays, here you are again.  Yay.

OMG Yes

Reading this article about the ‘Primal Wound‘ I had one of those moments, those ‘holy crap, how did the author peek into my life to research this theory/paper/case study?’ moments.

For love to be freely accepted there must be trust, and despite the love and security our daughter has been given, she has suffered the anxiety of wondering if she would again be rejected. For her this anxiety manifested itself in typical testing-out behavior. At the same time that she tried to provoke the very rejection that she feared, there was a reaction on her part to reject before she was rejected. It seemed that allowing herself to love and be loved was too dangerous; she couldn’t trust that she would not again be abandoned.
- Adoption: The Primal Wound by Nancy Verrier, M.A.