From The Devil’s Dictionary by Ambrose Bierce (1842 – 1914?)
Mind – A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain. Its chief acvity consists in the endeavor to ascertain its own nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has nothing but itself to know itself with.
Brain – An apparatus with which we think that we think.
Experience – The wisdom that enables us to recognize as an undesireable old acquaintance the folly that we have already embraced.
Achievement – The death of endeavor and the birth of disgust.
Delusion – The father of a most respectable family, comprising Enthusiasm, Affection, Self-denial, Faith, Hope, Clarity and many other godly sons and daughters.